A Kernel on Writing Anxiety
and how to get unstuck
Things I have done over the past several weeks instead of working on my novel: reading—so much reading, cleaning, running, binge-watching Killing Eve, attempting a life reorganization, scrolling on social media, and feeling guilty for not spending time on my novel. It’s just a day off, I’ll say to myself with the best intention to rest, rejuvenate. Instead, a day balloons into several and the pit of resistance in my stomach dictates my avoidance of the work I want to be doing, of progressing my novel.
When a writing project becomes tough, harder to penetrate, the desire to step away increases. After all, how many times have you heard a writer lament the weeks, months, or even years a story took to complete? And sometimes that’s needed! Sometimes space from your project allows your mind to work out plot holes or character motives, etc. But sometimes space is just space; it’s distance between yourself and the thing you want to be doing. It can be difficult to differentiate the two—I’m often mistaking my weeks away from a project as the “fresh breath” I needed when, in reality, it was deliberate avoidance. So what do I do to pull myself back into a project?
Read other stories
I am a slow writer by nature, but some days, stringing together sentences feels like what I’d presume pulling off a fingernail would feel like, that is, painful and unproductive. I start to question my ability as a writer: do I even know what a sentence is, let alone how to construct a good one? Is the flow repetitive? Are the adjectives dull and boring? A day like that provides the perfect set-up for my writing anxiety to take over the steering wheel and drive me far away from the page.
When that happens, I read. There is nothing quite like spending time with sentences formed by another person to help bring me back to words. It’s like an invitation to try for myself: See, this isn’t so hard. Go ahead and take a stab at it! Other stories often inspire me with their syntax and plot points and character description and overall cadence, which gets me excited to apply what I’ve read to my own story.
Go for a walk
If I’m stuck on a scene and my mind can’t work it out at the desk, I go for a walk or run. Much like Natalia, outdoor movement gives my mind the space to work on my novel. Before I get started, I set the intention of what I need to figure out, and then I move. Usually, I’ll have my phone handy so I can leave voice notes to myself about the scenes in question. The change of my surroundings helps my mind shift to new modes of problem solving. One time, I knew I had three scenes I needed to write, but didn’t know the particulars, and by the time I finished my walk, all three scenes were figured out.
Ease yourself back into it
Regardless of how long you’ve been away from your project, it can be hard to jump back in. Setting extreme goals or having unrealistic expectations for the first day back can send you right back to avoidance. Instead, I’ll start with rereading a previous scene or several scenes to transport my mind into the story. Then, maybe, I will think about what the next logical step is—outlining several scenes, rearranging story structure. Only after I’ve done a lot of thinking will I actually start writing. I’ll jot down a sentence, maybe two. Strive for 100 words, then 200. Small, micro goals give you the sense of completion while having the same effect as dipping your toes into the waters.
Bring back the fun
I love hearing stories about writers who cry while writing, who hate writing, who acknowledge the utter streak of masochism required to be a writer—not because I take pleasure in other people’s pain, but because I can relate to them. In a way, this is what keeps me going as a writer: knowing that the thing I am dedicating my life to is going to be hard, is going to require work. It’s a way for my mind to endure instead of give up.
However, when your writing anxiety is high, this type of “hardness” isn’t exactly effective at bringing you back to the page. I especially feel this way when I’ve imposed deadlines or importance to the work. The anxiety of “I can’t do this” overcomes me when, really, a reframe of “how can I make this fun?” is needed. If I answer the reframe, I’d say that I can make the process fun by writing a pretty sentence or putting my character in a weird situation. The fun pertains to the playfulness of crafting a story, not the external pressures associated with it.
Injecting yourself back into a writing project can be hard! But it’s doable and, dare I say, enjoyable. If you’re still feeling a bit stuck after trying these tips, might I recommend leaning on a writing friend. My motto: when in doubt, do a writing sprint (not the catchiest motto, I’ll admit, but you get the point!). Even having a casual chat with a writing friend can help break down the barriers to getting started again.
My kernel of advice: slow and steady wins the race.
Inspiration, Information, & Insight
After reading All Fours, Shelby listened to the Books Are Magic podcast episode where bookseller Alyx interviews Miranda July; she loved the perspective on motherhood the conversation brought, which reflects the book's themes.
Natalia is soaking up inspiration from her travels in Japan.
Sarah jumped back into reading after her weeklong “word fast.” Seeking inspiration for writing humor, she read Nora Ephron’s Heartburn (and watched the movie) and listened to the audiobook of Less by Andrew Sean Greer. Both struck the satirical, yet heartfelt, tone that Sarah loves. Then she read The Virgin Suicides by Jeffrey Eugenides (and watched the movie) and was blown away by how each and every sentence crackles with vivid writing.
Neidy is enjoying her 10-year college reunion this week.